Hey! New York Times Trump Headline

Hey! New York Times Trump Headline


-After four years of spewing
racist, anti-immigrant vitriol, President Trump read a scripted
denunciation of racism off the teleprompter yesterday, so the New York Times decided
to go with this banner headline, “Trump Urges Unity Vs. Racism.” TheTimeslater admitted the
headline was flawed and changed it
for subsequent editions, which brings us to a segment
called “Hey!” [ Cheers and applause ] All right, let’s take a look at a few seconds
of Trump urging unity. -In one voice,
our nation must condemn racism, bigotry, and white supremacy. These sinister ideologies
must be defeated. Hate has no place in America. -Hey, it doesn’t really sound like he was speaking
from his heart. I mean, even the painting of
George Washington behind him wasn’t buying it. [ Laughter ] You can’t say
someone urged something when they do it completely
without urgency. He’s already back
to quoting Fox News and attacking people
on Twitter again today. A better headline would’ve been “Teleprompter Urges Unity
While Old Man Watches.” I mean, hey,New York Times,is Trump writing
your headlines now? The only thing missing
from that were the typos. [ Laughter ] You’re supposed to be
the paper of record, not the paper
of record scratches. “Trump urges unity?!” [ Record scratches ] [ Laughter ] Hey,New York Times,
we depend on you. We need you
to learn the lessons of 2016, and one of them is
“Don’t just uncritically repeat whatever this president
reads off a teleprompter,” because he never means it. I mean, the real Trump always
comes out later in his tweets or his rallies
or during full moons. [ Laughter ] This headline was so weird, it was like when you read
a newspaper left behind by a time traveller
in a sci-fi movie and realize you’re
in an alternate timeline. “Trump Urges Unity”?! “Cleveland Browns
Win Super Bowl”?! [ Laughter ] Look,New York Times,
we love you. We depend on you, and that’s why
we need you to do better. I’m not saying
you’ll never make mistakes, I’m just hoping you’ll get wise
to Trump’s act, and when you do, I look forward
to reading the headline, “New York Times
Wakes the [Bleep] Up.” This has been “Hey!”

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